Sunday, April 10, 2011
Love and Respect
As noted from Mandy’s last update, we attended a marriage conference this weekend called “Love and Respect.” It was based off a book (or the book was based off of the conference, I’m not really sure) authored by Dr. Emerson Eggerich. He has been preaching this same message since about 1998 and it was hands down the best Mandy and I have ever heard on marriage. It was so simple, yet so complex, and so true. The total 7 hours of the conference was centered on one verse - Ephesians 5:33 “However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” He argues that since Ephesians 5 is known as the “marriage chapter” in the Bible and since Paul sums up the whole chapter with this statement, then it must be of most importance. He argues that the reason Paul includes these commands is because it meets each other’s basic needs. Women need love and men need respect. God has wired each one this way. He showed that both the Bible and secular research prove this statement to be true. Over the course of the conference He introduced 3 cycles: The Crazy Cycle – “without love she reacts without respect, and without respect he reacts without love,” The Energizing Cycle – “His love motivates her respect, and her respect motivates his love,” and The Rewarded Cycle – “His love regardless of her respect, and her respect regardless of his love.” God’s word is clear, and Ephesians 5:33 is a command. The great thing (and yes I am calling this great) is that God is calling each spouse to do something that neither one of them naturally does very well. I say this is great because to do these things, we must absolutely depend on Christ. Only as we allow Him to enter into our relationship with our spouses will we ever have success. May our efforts be an act of worship to our amazing Savior.